Became a National Couple with My Ex Chapter 26: If the Water Is Too Clear, There Will Be No Fish; if a Dog Has No Shame, It’s Unbeatable

Liang Yixuan kept sorting vegetables. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Bian Xu lift the jar of loaches onto the kitchen island, towering over it like a king looking down at a bunch of doomed ants.

Slowly, he picked up a sharp pair of scissors with the same elegance he used to hold a knife and fork. After observing for a moment, he carefully lowered the tips into the jar.

With a crisp "snip," he made his first cut—Splash!

The loaches scattered in all directions, and he completely missed.

Bian Xu raised an eyebrow and glanced at Liang Yixuan. Seeing that she wasn’t paying him any attention, he calmly reset the scissors, waited, and struck again—fast, precise, ruthless.

Snip—

Another miss.

After several empty attempts, Bian Xu set down the scissors, rubbed his neck, and stretched his fingers out.

But reality soon proved: no matter how fast your hands are—fast enough to play Flight of the Bumblebee in under a minute—you’re still no match for a slippery loach.

After a dozen rounds, his shirt was speckled with splashes of dirty water, while the loaches were not only unharmed but seemed to swim around even more energetically.

Liang Yixuan shook her head and sighed.

"This won’t work. Try grabbing one and knocking it out first."

Bian Xu tilted his head slightly, a brow arching in disbelief.

"…Grab it? Then knock it out?"

Liang Yixuan just remembered her grandma used to deal with live fish that way. It couldn't be too different. She looked around and handed him a pair of rubber gloves.

Bian Xu closed his eyes briefly, put on the gloves, and reached into the water—doing his best to ignore the slimy, stomach-turning texture—then grabbed down hard.

A loach landed in his hand. He flipped his palm and slammed it down onto the cutting board.

The slippery little thing instantly stopped moving.

Not so tough after all.

Bian Xu smirked, pinched the loach by its tail, and was about to call for Liang Yixuan to look— When the loach, apparently just playing dead, suddenly jerked back to life, wriggled out of his grip, and soared through the air in a perfect high arc...

Liang Yixuan, who had been quietly washing her hands, suddenly felt a chill on the back of her neck. She gasped softly.

Everyone chatting by the sofa turned their heads to look.

Bian Xu froze for half a second, then quickly ripped off his gloves.

"…Don’t move."

Something soft, cold, and alive was writhing against her skin. Liang Yixuan stood there rigidly, goosebumps all over her body, barely even breathing, afraid to make the slightest move.

Bian Xu placed one hand on her shoulder and the other reached down the back of her shirt collar, fishing the loach out.

Liang Yixuan lowered her eyes and watched the now truly unconscious loach flop onto the floor. She felt like she might faint herself.

From rage.

She slowly lifted her gaze to look at Bian Xu.

"I… I mean, it pretended to be dead earlier…" Realizing this was not the time to argue, Bian Xu quickly shut his mouth, grabbed some tissues, and awkwardly tried to wipe her neck.

Liang Yixuan shivered, pushed his hand away, and rushed upstairs without another word.

Bian Xu stood there in silence, then turned his head to look straight at the nearest camera. He pointed at it with the same finger that had just touched the loach.

"One minute. I want that jar gone."

The next kitchen shift was handled by Shen Ji and Cheng Nuo.

After the chaos, Shen Ji took over the rest of Liang Yixuan’s tasks and told Bian Xu to go upstairs and clean up.

Bian Xu, soaked and smelling like fish, definitely wanted a hot shower. But when he got to the second floor landing, he hesitated, then turned toward Liang Yixuan’s room instead.

The door was shut tight. He leaned in, listening, but couldn’t hear anything.

"Liang Yixuan?" he tried knocking softly.

No response.

"I… wasn’t trying to do that…" Bian Xu coughed awkwardly.

Would it even matter if he had been?

Of course Liang Yixuan knew he didn’t do it on purpose—but that didn’t mean she wasn’t furious.

Sometimes she really wondered what kind of terrible luck she'd had to end up stuck dealing with Bian Xu like this.

And the more she thought about it, the more she suspected—

Maybe today’s random task draw wasn’t so random after all. Maybe the producers had teamed up with Bian Xu to mess with her.

The longer she thought, the angrier she got. Hearing him still lingering outside, she raised her voice and snapped: "Go back to your room! I don’t want to see you again today!"

Liang Yixuan took a long, hot shower, changed clothes, and finally went back downstairs. Just in time—Shen Ji and Cheng Nuo had finished the food prep and were handing over the kitchen to Lin Xiao Sheng and Pan Yu.

On the living room sofa sat a young girl with twin ponytails, looking around curiously.

She must have been the fourth female contestant, just brought back by Duan Ye.

When she spotted Liang Yixuan, the girl’s eyes lit up and she stood up, waving excitedly.

"Hi! Are you Miss Liang?"

Liang Yixuan bent forward slightly and smiled.

"Yes, that’s me."

"Wow, you’re even prettier in person than on the show…" the girl said, staring at her in awe.

"Thank you." Liang Yixuan chuckled warmly, walking over and pointing to the sofa. "Have a seat."

The girl happily sat down.

Shen Ji, who had just finished his work, walked over and introduced the newcomer to the late-arriving Liang Yixuan.

"This is Zhao Meng'en, a student currently studying at Nanhuai Normal University's School of Music."

"Yes! You can just call me Xiao Zhao or Meng'en, Teacher Liang," Zhao Meng'en said quickly. Noticing she was sitting between Shen Ji and Liang Yixuan, she immediately stood up and offered her seat to Shen Ji.

"Brother Ji, you sit here!"

It was obvious this new girl had already watched the first four episodes of the show. She not only recognized everyone at a glance but seemed to have a sixth sense about their relationships—like how Shen Ji and Liang Yixuan had mutual affection for each other.

Shen Ji smiled and thanked Zhao Meng'en before sitting down beside Liang Yixuan. He leaned in and asked in a low voice, "Are you feeling better now?"

The back of Liang Yixuan's neck still felt a little chilly. But it was just psychological. Nothing actually serious had happened.

She shook her head and said, "I'm fine."

Shen Ji deliberately kept his voice down, not wanting to bring up Liang Yixuan’s embarrassing moment in front of the new guest. But to an outsider, their hushed conversation didn’t look so innocent.

At the stairway, Bian Xu stood watching from afar, his expression darkening.

Zhao Meng'en, sharp-eyed, spotted him right away and waved enthusiastically toward the stairs.

"Teacher Bian!"

Bian Xu glanced briefly in her direction.

Zhao Meng'en, full of excitement, stood up and hurried toward him.

"Teacher Bian, hello! I’m your fan! My name is Zhao Meng'en—you can call me Xiao Zhao or just Meng'en..."

But Bian Xu acted like he didn’t even hear her. Without glancing sideways, he brushed past her, walked straight over, and sat down on the single-seater chair across from Liang Yixuan. He narrowed his eyes slightly, staring at the ten centimeters of space between Liang Yixuan and Shen Ji.

That huge sofa, and they just had to sit practically glued together—what, were they carrying magnets or something?

Meanwhile, Liang Yixuan was sincerely thanking Shen Ji for helping her clean up the mess earlier and finishing her leftover work.

Zhao Meng'en, a bit embarrassed, went back to her seat. But she quickly regrouped and tried to strike up a conversation again.

"Teacher Bian, I really am a huge fan of yours! I attended almost every one of your concerts back when you performed in China, and I can even recite your songs backwards..."

Bian Xu, looking more and more impatient, glanced over.

Seeing that Liang Yixuan was completely focused on talking to Shen Ji, not even sparing him a glance—just like she had warned earlier—he stood up abruptly, leaving her with a cold sentence: "Then take your time reciting."

"…"

Liang Yixuan had been left with a mild trauma. Every time she saw Bian Xu, she immediately thought of the horrifying moment when the loach slipped into her shirt.

During lunch, the long dining table was set with four people on each side. Bian Xu took the southeast corner, so Liang Yixuan purposely chose the northwest corner—only then could she eat without feeling sick.

Since it was a welcome lunch for Zhao Meng'en, most of the conversation centered around her.

Liang Yixuan sat quietly in her corner, listening, learning that Zhao Meng'en was the same age as her and majored in vocal performance at the music academy. She had loved music ever since she was a child.

No wonder she called herself a die-hard fan of Bian Xu for years.

Every time Liang Yixuan glanced over, she could see Zhao Meng'en looking at Bian Xu with stars in her eyes.

It was a strange feeling—like looking at a younger version of herself.

Liang Yixuan spaced out a little as she watched Zhao Meng'en.

Bian Xu just happened to catch this melancholy look on her face.

He smirked quietly to himself, guessing her thoughts, but quickly put his serious expression back on.

Then he raised a hand toward Zhao Meng'en, cutting off her chatter: "Wang—"

Zhao Meng'en paused, confused.

"Liu—?" Bian Xu frowned, pretending to guess.

The table went quiet, everyone turning to look at him.

"Li—?"

"Teacher Bian, are you talking to me?" Zhao Meng'en asked carefully, blinking. "My last name is Zhao..."

"Oh," Bian Xu nodded lightly. "Miss Zhao, maybe you could follow Teacher Liang’s example during meals—talk a little less?"

"…"

Liang Yixuan looked up in surprise.

Bian Xu just spread his hands at her, an innocent look on his face.

Liang Yixuan frowned slightly in confusion and lowered her head again.

The food at the villa had never been up to Bian Xu’s standards, and after the loach incident that morning, he had completely lost his appetite. He barely touched his food during the meal, and his mind wasn't on eating at all.

Only after everyone put down their chopsticks did he seem to finally perk up, asking, "Everyone finished?"

Then he turned to Liang Yixuan and said, "Teacher Liang, shall we wash the dishes?"

Today's agreement had been that he and Liang Yixuan would handle the washing up too, so it made sense.

Now she understood why he had just been sitting there without moving — he was waiting for her.

Liang Yixuan responded calmly, "No need to trouble you, Teacher Bian. I think I can finish faster on my own."

Seeing Bian Xu’s expression, Zhao Meng'en quickly offered him an out: "Uh, Teacher Bian, you barely ate anything just now. Why don't you go have some fruit instead? I’ll help Teacher Liang wash the dishes."

"No need," Bian Xu smiled. "I love washing dishes. It's my second favorite hobby after music."

"…"

If there had been a playback reel at that moment, Lin Xiao Sheng would definitely have rewound it to Bian Xu’s second day on the show — when he had scoffed, "So many sponsors, yet not enough money for a dishwasher?"

Without saying anything, Liang Yixuan shook her head and began gathering the dishes, carrying a tall stack into the kitchen.

At the dining table, Bian Xu looked at the greasy, food-stained plates for a while, then turned his head away as if he couldn't bear the sight. Using only two fingers, he gingerly picked up a plate and followed her into the kitchen.

Everyone else slowly drifted away from the dining table.

In the quiet kitchen, Liang Yixuan stayed silent. She had no patience to teach Bian Xu step-by-step like she had that morning.

Left with no other choice, Bian Xu had to watch her and copy her method, gritting his teeth to hold back the nausea as he used chopsticks to scrape leftover food into the trash.

When they were finally done cleaning off the plates, Liang Yixuan tied up the garbage bag and carried it outside.

As she walked back to the doorway, she ran into Zhao Meng'en coming from the entrance hall.

"Teacher Liang!"

"Hm? What's up?"

Zhao Meng'en looked at her eagerly and pointed upstairs.

"Xiao Nuo is pulling people to play Dou Dizhu upstairs, and Brother Ji is there too. How about you join them? I’ll stay and help Teacher Bian wash the dishes!"

"You sure?" Liang Yixuan hesitated, kindly warning, "He’s... not very good at chores. He might end up making it harder for you."

She spared Bian Xu a bit of dignity by not saying bluntly, "he’s more likely to ruin things than help."

Zhao Meng'en patted her chest confidently.

"I'm sure! Teacher Liang, you can leave the kitchen to me!"

Meanwhile, back in the kitchen, Bian Xu was scrubbing his hands for the third time, trying to get the greasy feeling off.

Not wanting to ruin a second shirt today, he reluctantly pulled an apron over his head, frowning in disgust.

Hearing footsteps approaching, Bian Xu looked up, about to ask Liang Yixuan what to do next — only to see Zhao Meng'en smiling brightly at him.

"Teacher Bian, I’m here to help you wash the dishes!"

Bian Xu's face darkened. He glanced past her, looking toward the staircase.

Following his gaze, Zhao Meng'en turned to look.

"Oh, Teacher Liang went upstairs to play Dou Dizhu with Brother Ji and the others."

Bian Xu was silent for three full seconds, then calmly untied his apron and tossed it aside.

"Teacher Bian... you’re not washing anymore?" Zhao Meng'en asked carefully.

"Mm."

Zhao Meng'en pouted, looking at him with big sad eyes.

"But just now you said washing dishes was your hobby..."

Bian Xu gave a forced, fake smile, then turned to head upstairs.

"Sorry. I have a new hobby now — playing Dou Dizhu."